Thursday, March 27, 2014

Chronic Bitch Face?!

Hey girl heyyy!! ;)

So today I was talking to one of my good friends, and she told me that the first time she saw me, she thought I looked like a total bitch. Then she proceeded to tell me that after she got to know me she found that I was one of the sweetest people she's ever met. Thanks for the, uh, compliment?! Haha. This definitely isn't the first time I've been told this. I can't even count how many people have told me that I have a "bitch face". Here are some things you need to know about Chronic Bitch Face.

Chronic Bitch Face- n. "The debilitating disorder in which a woman has a natural 'angry', 'agitated', or sometimes expressionless look on her face while her face is resting, unbeknownst to her, making her look like a complete and utter bitch."

1.) I have a "resting bitch face". My bitch face can strike at any time, but happens mainly when I'm just hanging out, not doing anything. (e.g. sitting in class, watching a movie, listening to someone tell a story, etc.) I'm not doing it on purpose!!

2.) NO, nothing is wrong with me. Just because the look on my face is similar to someone whose cat was just run over, doesn't mean I'm actually pissed. No, I'm not mad. I'm not upset. I'm not particularly constipated. I promise I didn't just murder a family of 4, even though my facial expression may make you question that. You didn't say anything to offend me. (If you did, believe me, you'd know!!) It's just my face.  LOL.


3.) 99.9% of the time I don't notice that I'm making a "bitchy face". If I do notice that my face is looking extra bitchy, I'll make an effort to smile more and attempt to relax my face. When I notice someone staring at me or giving me a dirty look, I smile. Most of the time I'm getting a dirty look from another girl because they think I'm sitting there mean mugging them when really I'm just sitting there. If the girl continues to give me a dirty look even after I smile, then I'll ask her what her problem is, because it's clearly not my bitch face. ;)

4.) If you don't know me, you don't have the right to ask me what's wrong. People need to mind their own damn business as it is, but living with chronic bitch face is like a magnet that attracts nosy people. It's annoying enough when a stranger wants to know what's wrong; (what if something actually happened-- like someone just died or I was fighting with my fiance-- do you really think I would tell you (a stranger) about it?!) but when they repeatedly question me and ask if I'm sure, it gets really annoying. I understand they're partly trying to help (and partly trying to be in my business) but it gets harder and harder to abstain from punching someone in the throat the more it happens. (haha)




5.) Having Chronic Bitch Face is a lot of work. The actual bitchy look comes natural, but the things that come along with having CBF is very tiring. It's not easy to reassure friends, family members, and total strangers that you are OK 20+ times per day. When you have a constant bitchy look on your face, you have to put in an extra effort to look happy, even if you really are happy. It's not particularly fun to have people look absolutely terrified of you when you sit across from them in the doctor's office or at a park while your kids are playing. Interviews and first impressions scare you because you have to remember to make a point to continually smile until your cheeks hurt, otherwise your possible future employer or future ex-husband may think that you steal candy from small children for fun. Speaking of small children, when you are affected by CBF, you have to theatrically smile at children like you're auditioning for a role on Pee Wee's Playhouse, or they might run from you. It's not always fun to have a bitchy face.


6.) Don't judge a book by it's cover-- even if it's a bitchy cover. Clearly you shouldn't judge a person by their physical appearance anyway, but this is especially true for people with CBF. Of course I have my bitchy moments, and can be a total asshole if needed, but normally I am one of the sweetest people you'll ever meet. I have a huge heart, && I love helping people, whether I know them personally or not. I always give everyone a chance && try to give people the benefit of the doubt when first meeting them, and not judge them, even if I've heard something negative about them. If you suspect someone has Chronic Bitch Face, smile at them. If they don't smile back, they're more than likely really a bitch. If they do smile back at you, it's just their face. They can't control it. 

Obviously this post is supposed to be lighthearted and humorous, but everything in it is 100% true. LOL. Do you know anyone with Chronic Bitch Face? Do you have it? Let me know in the comments below!! Thanks for reading. <3

xo, Sarah

26 comments:

  1. I really wish we could stop judging one another, I like to get to know a person before I make a decision about them :)

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    1. I agree. First impressions are important, but you shouldn't completely rely on a first impression to judge someone. I always give the person a chance before I make my mind up about them as well. :)

      xo, Sarah

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    2. I wanted to drop by and tell you I have missed you in the blog world .... I know life can be very busy though... just thinking about you and wanted to say hi ;-)

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    3. I miss you Sarah... I've thought about you... I hope everything is well with you ;-)

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  2. i totally get you! many people say i was a stuck up brat the first time they see me but after that, well, i became best friend with one of them!

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    1. It's funny how that happens, isn't it?! ;) People are probably missing out on a lot of great friends because they're so judgmental!! Thanks for your comment sweetie. <3

      xo, Sarah

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  3. Oh my gosh, reminds me of when my ex's friends saw my photo for the first time and were like 'wow she looks like a bitch' what even?? How shallow and judgemental can people be seriously :| funny thing is when people get to know people they judge, 99% of the time they are wrong :')

    ♥ Little Owl Diary

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    1. Thanks for the comment. I agree!! People are ridiculously judgmental and they're losing out on a chance to gain a really good friend by labeling someone as a "bitch" because of how they look. Their loss. ;)

      xo, Sarah

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  4. Face & style is awesome!!!!!Great outfit dear!!!
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  5. I don't judge I believe You should look at yourself first before judging other.
    http://tifi11.blogspot.com

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    Replies
    1. If only more people thought that way!! :)

      xo, Sarah

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  6. Hahah I love that this post is lighthearted, but nevertheless, true. So many of my friends I thought were bitches before I got to know them! And so many that say they judged me completely wrong when they first saw me… Just goes to show.

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    1. Thanks for your comment pretty girl!! :) It was about time for a different type of post, I like to mix things up sometimes. This is very relatable for a lot of women, so I used humor but still got my point across. ;) The saying "you should never judge a book by it's cover" is so cliche but it can be applied to so many different aspects of everyday life. :)

      xo, Sarah

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  7. Love this, so true & hilarious! I've had people say this to me a few times!

    Yasmeen x
    http://themirroraffects.blogspot.co.uk

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    1. It's always interesting to find out what people thought about you upon first impressions. haha. ;) Thanks for commenting!!

      xo, Sarah

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  8. Totally agree doll: don't judge a book by it's cover-- even if it's a bitchy cover!!!!!
    Kisses from Italy!!!

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    1. LOL @ "even if it's a bitchy cover". I love it. <3 Thanks for commenting Paola!!

      xo, Sarah

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  9. Haha! I have it too which is why I'm always smiling in my blog photos :)

    -Sharon
    The Tiny Heart
    Cash Giveaway!

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  10. Girl, I've been told I have a permanent "death stare" (ie euphemism for chronic bitch face) all the time. This post is amazing. Following you back, lady!

    xo,
    Stephanie
    Diary of a Debutante
    www.thediaryofadebutante.com

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  11. Hi, Sarah!!

    First of all, GREAT post! Second, thanks for stopping by the other day. It's so sweet of you to keep checking in on me. I swear, I'm going to try and get back to posting soon!! It's heartwarming to know I still have Bloggy Buddies out there!!

    xoxox

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  12. You make me laugh! My friend once told me that I sometimes make a 'f*** me' face or something like that, I can't even remember the exact words that she used, but basically it's the same.. Love it! Would love to meet you in real life! :)
    www.minsbeautyequipment.com

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    1. That's too funny!! Lol. I would love to meet you, I think we'd get along so well! Thanks for your comment sweetie. ❤

      xo, Sarah

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  13. I love this post! A friend of mine is definitely suffering from that! Hahaha

    Much love xxx
    www.christinanista.blogspot.com

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  14. haha too funny! I've been seeing memes and articles about this!
    x
    - Andrea
    www.phdfashionista.com

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